Should you starve people of your presence?
Just so you can focus on YOU.
Scott Adams says everyone ought to be selfish.
You can't help anyone without having yourself together first.
Else it becomes - a blind leading a blind.
I thought about that deeply.
I am ineffective when I worry and obsess about things I can't control.
That is mostly around other people. People I care about.
I have reached a level of comfort with my own thoughts. Definitely improved in this area. I feel that even if something "bad" were to happen involving me, I would have a mental conversation to get out of the victim mode.
But when it comes to others, I have no such control. And the more I try to influence or help - the more ineffective I feel. Even worse - I feel helpless. A state I do not enjoy.
I think the best thing I could do is focus on me.
Get to the point where I have the abundance of time and energy to be present with the people I care about rather to influence them directly.
So maybe I should start by making myself scarce - starvation mode - where I have little positive impact.