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Mar 21, 2019 10:49:57

This is uncomfortable

by @kathleencelmins | 477 words | 🐣 | 3💌

Kathleen Celmins

Current day streak: 0🐣
Total posts: 3💌
Total words: 1278 (5 pages 📄)

I'm a supporter of Brian, so when he asked me to join him on this platform, I said, sure.

Writing 200 words a day is something I committed to doing at the beginning of the year. It was a resolution I made to myself because I'd spent the previous year writing big long blog posts for my company blog that weren't getting read and weren't all that fun to write.

So now here we are, almost all the way through the first quarter, and I've done it. I've written more than 200 words a day, if you count writing a lot one day and not a lot another day, which I do. The goal was 52,000 words for myself in 2019, which is 13,000 words per quarter, and, not counting this entry, I'm at 16,340.

But it was all for myself. Not for anyone else.

All I wanted to do was write. Get back into the habit of writing. I used to keep a diary, but I started blogging in 2006 and my ego thought, "HEY! Why keep a diary when you can get instant feedback on your words with your blog?"

Blogging is uniquely suited to a person's ego.

Instead of writing in a leather-bound notebook, I could get to my keyboard, which was faster anyway.

I could give the password of my diary to my friends. They'd write back.

Then, of course it got bigger.

I blogged my way out of debt. Anonymously at first, because I didn't want my friends and family to know the extent to which I'd buried myself. I found people online who didn't judge me. They helped me get out of debt and find my friends.

That writing was raw. I liken it to bleeding on the keyboard.

As the years went by, the writing got less raw. I learned how to optimize for keywords and grow my readership through search engines.

I got a job at a content marketing company.

I started a marketing company.

I wrote hundreds of thousands of words, and if I'm being honest, as many of those words were noise as were signal.

So, when planning how 2019 was going to be different, I thought... hey, I remember writing.

I bought Ulysses, then Bear, because the latter is significantly cheaper and does the same thing only in more fun fonts, and committed to writing every day.

I write first thing in the morning, unless I don't. Then it's whenever I can fit it in.

In January, I wrote every day. My goal was 200 words a day. Most days in January I wrote more. Then I had a baby and fell off the writing cliff.

But this is the first writing I'm doing outside of Bear.

And it's uncomfortable.

Because why on earth does this drivel need to be out in the public sphere?

It doesn't.

But you support the friends who supported you.

  • 1

    @kathleencelmins hi, nice to meet you :-)
    so I have two association to your post,
    1. I was thinking that doing things in public is a pretty old tradition ;-)
    Why we get married in public... to let other people know so that (a) we feel more pressure to not "unmarry" (b) so that they know, we need help to not "unmarry" (right @philh? hihi)
    It's the same here, we want to feel the pressure to make an effort every day, and we really can find support here, even just reading others having the same problems :-)
    (and there might be even "special places" to look for support from peers, right @basilesamel :D
    2. @brandonwilson didn't share ti with you, but he wrote a beautiful and inspiring text https://200wordsaday.com/words/get-uncomfortable-32885c34caf008283
    so let's get uncomfortable!

    Lucjah avatar Lucjah | Mar 22, 2019 16:18:41
    • 1

      @kathleencelmins @lucjah Thank you for the mention. By the way, I think divorce proceedings (otherwise known as "to unmarry") should be just as public as the marriage ceremony. Invite all the same people who were there at the beginning to see it through to the end. :)

      Brandon Wilson avatar Brandon Wilson | Mar 22, 2019 08:56:40
    • 1

      @kathleencelmins @brandonwilson absolutely! (though I'd rather invite them to our 25th anniversary or something I must admit)

      Lucjah avatar Lucjah | Mar 22, 2019 18:01:33
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      @lucjah thanks for linking to @brandonwilson post -- it is great! I am digging this site, simply because it reminds me of the early days of putting writing out on the internet. and I mean that in the best possible way.

      Kathleen Celmins avatar Kathleen Celmins | Mar 25, 2019 07:00:17
  • 1

    @kathleencelmins welcome Kathleen! Congrats for the baby :)
    I didn't get the Bears thing.. What does it mean?

    PhilH avatar PhilH | Mar 21, 2019 19:11:01
  • 1

    @kathleencelmins Congratulations on your first post! I am looking forward to reading what you are willing to share.

    Brandon Wilson avatar Brandon Wilson | Mar 21, 2019 11:07:08
    • 1

      @brandonwilson thanks! happy to be here.

      Kathleen Celmins avatar Kathleen Celmins | Mar 22, 2019 06:45:25
  • 1

    She literally had a baby folks! What's your excuse? ( Welcome @kathleencelmins ! )

    Brian Ball avatar Brian Ball | Mar 21, 2019 11:06:28
    • 1

      @brianball ha thanks -- could I have tagged you in the post instead of just writing "Brian" I wonder?

      Kathleen Celmins avatar Kathleen Celmins | Mar 22, 2019 06:45:51
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