Have you ever read sentences that are really long and lose track of its main point?
This is what we should avoid in writing.
And it happens when we are over stretching thoughts.
How do we do that? By adding too many subclauses in a sentence.
A sub clause is a sentence that support the main clause. It can't stand on its own.
An examples of Sub clause:
We can all go for ice cream if I can find my wallet.
There's nothing wrong in the sentence above. Problem arises when you add one too many in a sentence.
Honda faces growing competition in the US, where economic conditions remain weak, from Mazda, a rival in japan.
The sentence above is hard to follow since there are too many sub clauses within.
This can be solved by moving the sub clause to the front and writing it in a more descriptive manner.
Here's the rewrite:
Honda faces growing competition from Japanese rival Mazda in the US, where economic conditions remain weak.
Here's a real sentence I found online.
I would search the Internet for images and videos of games that were currently on the market and compare them to the type of product I was creating.
I would search the Internet for popular images and videos of games and compare them to the type of product I was creating.
Although "popular images" and "images that are on the market" doesn't have the exact meaning.
Popular images by default are on the market and designers use them for reference all the time.
- You should write your sentence one point at a time.
- If there are too many points and subclauses in a sentence, break them up or rewrite them in a descriptive manner.
- Remove subclauses wherever possible without changing the original meaning.